It’s extremely early for Super Bowl daydreaming, but I am going to do it anyway, because I take risks. Teams here are ranked solely based on likelihood that they will win the Super Bowl.
1.New England Patriots
- This should be the shortest blurb I ever write. Brady/Belichick = Super Bowl appearance. It’s very easy math.
2. Philadelphia Eagles
- The defending champs have improved in a lot of ways. They upgraded from Torrey Smith to Mike Wallace. They will also gain some key pieces back from IR, and the promotion of Mike Groh to OC should help the wideouts excel. The one thing that they may not have at their disposal: a healthy Carson Wentz. It sounds like there’s two pretty distinct schools of thought on this injury situation. Some, think this is a tired offseason trope, and that he’ll be ready to play in week one with no problems. Is this the Eagles and Doug Peterson not trying to “Colts” themselves with their injured QB? Others are not as confident. They assert that less than nine months is not enough time for him to fully heal, and that the doctors will be more conservative with him. The presence of Nick Foles also feeds into the theory that the Eagles would be alright with sitting Wentz to start the season. I think he will end up being out there, but if it really is this close, then who knows?
3. Jacksonville Jaguars
- The Jaguars being the Jaguars is good for football. Defensively, watching greatness is alway compelling. Winning with a defense first formula is awesome to see in 2018. Also, I love the trash talk. It’s fun, they aren’t saying anything actually offensive, and the character of a Jalen Ramsey only comes around every decade or so. Offensively you can’t say enough about Leonard Fournette, and they feature an O-line that should improve with FA pick up, Andrew Norwell, solidifying the left inside spot. But I can’t believe it’s taken me 95 words to mention the name Blake Bortles. He’s really a key piece of the AFC puzzle. If he can not suck for long enough, this team is gonna be right back in it come final four time.
4. Pittsburgh Steelers
- It would be a shame if the triplet of Ben, Brown, and Bell never reach a Super Bowl. This year is probably their best and last bet. Talent has never been their issue, and this team has gotten hot at the right time before,only to be bounced out of January. Two things stand in this teams way every year, one predictable, and one not. First, the Patriots. I sort of liked how the deal with this team last year was “let’s ‘scorched earth’ this regular season, because the final matchup with NE is all that really matters.” Then the team gets taken out in Jacksonville before they could even reach their destiny of losing to Brady again. Oh right the other thing standing in front of them. Injuries. We have all heard the stats about how Bell plays without Brown, or Ben plays without Bell, or how Brown plays on a Tuesday with a full moon 30 minutes after he’s eaten and gotten into the pool (probably still pretty well tbh). We’ve seen what this team can do in Houston vs the 4-11 Texans in December. We’ve seen what they do in Cincinnati, and Baltimore, and Cleveland every year. They just need to do it in Foxborough in the new year.
5. Green Bay Packers
- Aaron Rodgers will be back to his old self again, and that should be enough for at least ten wins. The Packers are always one of those teams that can win any game at any time, but gone are the days of jumping out to 21-0 first quarter leads. This team seems to have to try a little harder nowadays, and with the addition of Jimmy Graham to the offense, things should open up a little wider for them. Still, the lack of speed continues to be an issue. I actually like Pettine and the young secondary. But this team has to hope a lot of things go their way for them to play well on defense. The D-line has to hope everyone is available. They have to hope that Clay Matthews and Nick Perry still have what it takes to meet in the middle at the QB. And they have to hope the young guys figure out the defense in time to not get roasted by Matt Ryan on national TV for the fourth time in three years.
6. Minnesota Vikings
7. Atlanta Falcons
- Stiiiiiiill not sold on the whole “Sarkisian” deal on offense, but it’s really hard to screw up Julio Jones (unless you’re the right side of the left end zone turf in Philadelphia) so I’m still trying to determine if it even matters who is calling plays.
What I am sold on is this defense. Stars at every level. There’s at least 7 players that have a good shot at making a pro-bowl. Did you see how they were playing towards the end of the year? Put the blazing hot LA Rams offense on ice, only before making Nick Foles look like what we thought Nick Foles would look like. This team could win the NFC going away again, or, they could be aimlessly wandering for two months and be out of it at 5-6 by Thanksgiving.
8. Los Angeles Rams
- Over the course of me writing this blog, I’m gonna make myself look stupid quite a bit. So for posterity’s sake, I will admit right now that it may be a bad idea to drop the Rams here at #8. Yes, I have heard of that Sean McVey guy and how he “Ghost Whispers” to his QBs. Yes, I have heard of Wade Phillips, championship winning DC coming to town. Yes, I have heard of Ndamukong Suh. He’s the guy that stepped on/kicked/slammed to the ground/dove at the knee of that dude right? Take your pick.
An innumerable amount of weapons on the offense, as well as combined with A+ coaching should be good enough for the NFC West crown, and maybe the NFC as a whole. Still, they are a young team that hasn’t accomplished much. Yet.
9. Los Angeles Chargers
- Okay so all of these teams in the top ten are good. The Chargers positioning at nine is based on my assertion that there are eight teams more likely to reach the big game than they are. They also are, top to bottom, the most talented team in the NFL. Both can be true at the same time. Is Phillip Rivers gonna keep being Phillip Rivers at 36/37? He sure could be. That, injuries (sensing a theme?), and a serviceable kicker are the only things stopping the other team from LA representing the AFC.
10. New Orleans Saints
- The Saint’s successfully transitioned to a different team last season. They exploded with a great running game, their defense picked up the slack, and Drew Brees didn’t have to throw for 5,000 yards again to go 7-9. All of this should probably hold true, so long as Brees stays awesome. The defense had high talent in the secondary and on the line of scrimmage, but the soft linebacker crew could pose a problem. Sidenote: Sean Payton’s gotta keep those glasses. Reminds me of Mike Holmgren’s glasses in the 90’s.
11. Dallas Cowboys
- While the Cowboys have really only been “America’s Team” literally instead of figuratively lately (which is to say they are a team based in America), this club has the potential to steal the eyes of the country from week to week based off of their play. Notice I didn’t say hearts. Lookin’ at you Jerry! They have “the best running back in the league” – a quote taken directly from ME – , a truly talented QB, and the best offensive line in football. One of their major losses from last year was a lingering sense of dread hanging around the team because of Zeke Elliot’s suspension. More of an addition by subtraction kinda thing, huh. This year they should be able to play better without the distraction that is the suspension, and Dez Bryant. Also, it wouldn’t be September football if we didn’t have a member of the Cowboys Defensive line facing their own suspension!
12. Carolina Panthers
- Every Panthers season since Cam Newton arrived, and every season after until he retires, can really just be boiled down to two categories: Good Cam seasons, and Bad Cam seasons. Cam is an MVP candidate? 15-1. Cam completes 52% of his passes? 7-9. He has some good pieces around him, and with his natural ability he can single handedly win games. The defense (see: linebackers) is always a force, and could help Carolina to a 12-4 record, or they could spiral hard to a 4-12. I’m thinking the former is much more likely.
13. Detroit Lions
- Are the Lions ready to make a playoff run this year? Definitely maybe, although this team always seems to fight through a malaise about halfway into the season. LaGary Blount is an interesting addition to a team that has had RB problems since Sanders. Can he be who he was in NE for coach Patricia? Future Hall of Famer Matt Stafford and Co. – or should I say Jim Bob Cooter and Co. – should be gangbusters on offense with a viable running game. Let’s get a pass rush, and start to beat teams with a winning record, and we can all root for Detroit to fulfill their sad-sports-town destiny of choking away a game in January.
14. Seattle Seahawks
- As I scan the Seahawks offensive depth chart, I sigh. Why, WHY are you doing this to Russell Wilson. Remember when he was the afterthought of this team? When it was a competitive advantage to pay the young guy less than everyone else? Now the dude is a bonafide superstar, not to mention he was like, 86% percent of all Seahawks offense last year (including a game where he was 101% of the offense). He has blossomed into the perennial league MVP we all knew he could be, and now we stick him with the remains of a roster once thought to be unstoppable. There’s no question he will make up a great percentage of offense this year, all the while having to make up for a defense that is high key rebuilding.
15. Houston Texans
- Man, I really hope we get a stellar season out of Deshaun Watson. He is such a fun player to watch when he’s right. Besides, it will help make the AFC a little more interesting. Other than that I feel like injuries have caused JJ Watt to leave the public consciousness, but don’t worry, he will make you remember if he can stay on the field. I’m tired of seeing him walk around the sidelines in cities. I can’t help but feel the skill position players are tailored to Watson’s strengths; they’re all so fast. Is this the year the third best WR in the league makes his mark? I seem pretty optimistic about Houston’s potential, don’t worry. If they don’t play well and win, Bill O’Brien will be gone. No pressure.
16. Kansas City Chiefs
- Andy Reid’s 18th campaign as a NFL head coach offers him something off the norm. New thrower Patrick Mahomes is the owner of only one NFL start, making him an incredibly unknown talent. Reid has been known to make offense out of lemons throughout his career so he should have Mahomes ready to go. With new receiver Sammy Watkins and old receiver Tyreek Hill, the offense should connect smoothly. The defense is another story. Eric Berry must reel in a unit that 28th in yards allowed last year without star Marcus Peters.
17. Baltimore Ravens
- This “Will Joe Flacco Try Harder” narrative has been extremely tiring all offseason and now that we are in August I just want it to end. The offense is still not exciting, but that isn’t really their deal anyways. Though, their receiver additions (Crabtree, Snead, Brown) do bring their rank up to adequate in that department. They do have a defense that builds prospects in a lab, and is now operating in its 20th straight year of being dominant. Seems that long, doesn’t it? The newest invention: Matt Judon. He is in line to take Terrell Suggs’ throne as the next star Ravens Pass Rusher, and keep the unit relevant for another 20. Is Harbaugh on the hot seat if he can’t get to the playoffs again this year?
18. New York Giants
- What will be the undoing of the ’18 Jints? How about the Manning/Shurmur mind meld. I am out on Eli Manning as a viable 16 game starter in 2018. He has hit the same wall his brother hit in late ’15, and New York is gonna be wishing they had one of the first round QB’s in this past May’s draft. Now, that doesn’t mean their actual pick, Saquon Barkley won’t be a star from day one. When was the last top ten RB that led his team to a Super Bowl title? Marshawn Lynch? Ray Rice? Whatever, it’s probably fine. How can you screw up quarterbacking when you have OBJ, Evan Ingram, and Sterling Shepard? I’ll tell you how: you have offensive line play like you did last year. I hope Nate Solder can help out. Also, Mike Shula is meh. Sorry Mike.
19. Cincinnati Bengals
- Yet another team with a scale tipping towards one side of the ball. I have high hopes for this offense, and if the Bengals get the honor of losing the wildcard game again this year, that is the reason why. John Ross looks good. Joe Mixon looks ready to ascend. A.J. Green is still A.J. Green. A great Glenn trade on the line should bring this all together. Now the defense. There’s a lot of names you may know, but other than Geno Atkins, it’s mostly just myth and hearsay. A middle of the pack offering, the defense can be good, but is it more likely they are good, or the Bengals continue their existence as they always have. Bungling through life.
20. Washington Football Club
- I’ve been wondering whether Alex Smith was an upgrade over Kirk Cousins for four months now, and I’m still not totally sure. While Smith is the more steady hand, and had his best downfield passing season last year, are we really ready to believe hes gonna suddenly be this next level guy in D.C.? In the context of Cousins never winning a big game though, I still think Smith brings something different to the table. He’s a good, accurate thrower, he’s better on the run, and he’s got weapons on the inside and outside to play with. He could still even put up Cousins-like numbers, and I really cant tell if that’s gonna make this team bad or good. Sometimes football’s confusing. We may not resolve this debate until after Jan. 1, and if Washington is still playing, we will have our answer.
21. Tennessee Titans
- Even though the Titans hang on at 21, they do have a lot going for them. Let’s talk about what they don’t have first: any idea what’s in their WR room. Taylor, Davis, and Sharpe? I feel like this is the poorest man’s version of the Adam Thielen and Stefon Diggs hyper-underrated Minnesota duo. They just need to start, um, doing things. Dion Lewis was a great add, and Derrick Henry will be a quality player for Tennessee. On the other side of the ball, a couple of defects from NE, Logan Ryan and Malcolm Butler, should definitely increase the units potential. Was Mike Vrabel the best choice? Let’s make sure it wasn’t just being a former Patriot that has him qualified for the job.
22. San Francisco 49ers
- The “it” man is Jimmy G, but the focus should be on Kyle Shanahan and his efforts to bring back the Niners to the front of the NFC. But okay, we’ll indulge: Garoppolo is a unique talent under center, and he should carry the team to a respectable record, as all top QB’s can. He’s got a weird collection of talent playing with him on offense. Is Pierre Garcon still a #1 wideout? Is Jerick McKinnon a #1 halfback? The D is full of young talent, and I love the addition of Richard Sherman. Thomas, Foster, Buckner, and Armstead each have the skill to become household names. Jaquiski Tartt should be a household name because it’s delightful to say out loud.
23. Arizona Cardinals
- Maybe the biggest loss for any team coming out of last year is Arizona losing Bruce Arians. Steve Wilks will have a lot to work on, but a lot to work with in his first season in red. First he’s got David Johnson, the forgotten All-Pro, and Larry Fitzgerald (161 targets last year. Come on people) on offense. In his defense, he’s got Pat Peterson, Jamar Taylor and a ball hawking secondary to pair with an underrated pass rush led by ex-Patriot Chandler Jones. But the main difference on the field? Rookie quarterback Josh Rosen. This guy is supposed to be mobile, accurate, and his decision making skills are exemplary. If Wilks can get his QB to play ball his way, the Cards may shock some people.
24. Oakland Raiders
- Chuckie’s back! That’s the story with the Raiders these days, and apparently the next ~3650 days as well. We’ll see how Gruden’s plan (does anyone know what the plan is yet?) plays out, but as you can see by the 24th ranking, i’m not yet convinced. The real story should be Derek Carr and the passing offense, which failed the team last year. They employ Amari Cooper, who wants us all to forget he can catch, Jordy Nelson, who wants us to forget he’s fast, and Martavis Bryant, who would like us to forget everything he has said in the media in the past year. If Gruden can fix the throwing game, he may have something in an offense already ready to bruise with a strong line and Marshawn Lynch. The defense was a tire fire last year, and unless they fix their 6’3″ 252 lb problem, they will remain ablaze.
25. Indianapolis Colts
- 2018, the year in which we get to find out if Andrew Luck is the kind of QB that can save his team from being a dumpster fire, or if he’ll sink like an anchor on the Titanic; doesn’t make it go down but doesn’t keep it afloat. Can Malik Hooker play all eleven positions at once on defense, cause that is the only way they allow less than 28 per game. T.Y. Hilton and Jack Doyle are the teams pass catching threats, and they have a sneaky-okay offensive line for Marlon Mack to run for 800 yards through. Speaking of sneaky-okay, the AFC as a whole is sort of blah, so the Colt’s chances of sneaking in somewhere off of Luck’s right arm can be noted. Problem is, the only good AFC division is the one the Colts currently reside in. Someone’s gotta be the odd one out in the south, and it might be the team without a defense.
26. Denver Broncos
- Why do the Broncos feel like a less intimidating Jaguars, with a worse defense and no running game? It’s because they are. Trevor Siemian – I mean Case Keenum, will be okay, but I’m not sure he’s good enough to lift this team to the playoffs this year on his own. With no offensive line and sub par skill position players like Devontae Booker and Jeff “Jets” Heuerman, I am not seeing where or how the points come yet. It’s kind of a shame when you think of how good this defensive line can be with Von Miller and Bradley Chubb, the man that should have been the fourth overall pick, but now has to live forever with the shame of being fifth overall.
27. Chicago Bears
- It seems like EVERYONE AND DAER MAHDERS are picking DA BEARS to be a NFC dark-horse. I think they are a year away. Still not sold on Trubisky as the QB of the future. Allen Robinson and Taylor Gabriel don’t really do it for me. They can’t even get their first round pick in camp until TODAY. What they do have is two dynamic runners, an underrated offensive line, and a defense that has a few really nice pieces. They’re getting there, but leave 2018 for Rodgers, Cousins, and Stafford to fight over.
28. Miami Dolphins
- Feels like it was DECADES ago when Adam Gase took this team to the postseason. Well, it’s been two, and the Dolphins essentially took a gap year last year when they shook hands with Jay Cutler in the offseason. Now, with Tannehill back they should be ready to pick up where they left off. BUT WAIT! Who else do we have? Jarvis Landry? Hahaha no. He’s off in Cleveland telling his teammates it’s not okay to miss practice just cause. Jay Ajayi? Hahahaha, no. He was traded away to the Eagles. Why, too many Jays on one team? Nope, he was mad that even when he won he didn’t get the ball enough, so they sent him to Philly and he got to win a Super Bowl. Kenyan Drake is co starting with Frank Gore, who has to just be a robot by this point. I mean come on. It’s 2018 and we are still writing about his NFL journey. Also, I’m not saying Drake is underrated, but I’m pretty sure his Madden rating is just two question marks. Is he even the first one that comes up when you google his name?
Editor’s note: He is.
29. New York Jets
- I can think of four seasons in the last decade for the Jets that should have even warranted enthusiasm. In ’08 Brett Favre had just joined the team, and people were still pushing this theory that there was a “rivalry” between Belichick and Eric Mangini. I’m upset I even put those two in the same sentence. In 2010 and 2011 they were coming off AFC championship appearances. Lastly we have this year, where the promises of the next decade are strapped firmly to the arm of Sam Darnold. Todd Bowles might even get another crack at building this thing if he can coach his team to a respectable 8-8. If Darnold is good, the Jets could find a way out of mediocrity. If he’s not, I’m sure there’s some league-wide conspiracy to put down a team in one of America’s smallest markets, *looks closely* New York City.
30. Cleveland Browns
- Okay so this low ranking means the Browns have virtually no chance to win the Super Bowl. But wait! They do have something this year they have only had once in the last two years: a chance to win a game. And this time, it doesn’t matter which QB they play! Let me use this space to convey my formal thoughts on the ’18 Browns so many have high(ish) hopes for: No, they will not make the playoffs. No, they will not win eight games. No, Hugh Jackson will not get another year without one of these things. The organization is the second most poorly run in the league (Hello #20) and if HBO’s Hard Knocks is any indication, even the coaches cant get their shit together enough to deal with each other. Still, this team has its future QB and his development is all that this season should be about.
31. Tampa Bay Buccaneers
- The newest team to decide assaulting women isn’t enough to lose your job over comes in at #31. What, this guy is not the beacon of light that is morality?! Hey Jameis, can you count on one hand how many times you’ve done something that makes Darren Sharper stand up and give you a slow clap?
Even Nike said uh-uh to Winston! Why do some 60+ billion dollar entities get to have morals, and others don’t? This is how the Bucs are viewed at large:
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Two gifs of your team being laughable in one game? Yikes. At least Winston won’t have the chance to embarass himself in three of them. P.S. When the league is making plea deals with accused offenders because they don’t want to embarass themselves in court, it’s probably a good sign that there needs to be some changes in the CBA about discipline.
32. Buffalo Bills
- Poor Bills. Four Super Bowl losses in a row and now they are last place on the first ever power rankings? Tough blow. A Lifetime of Suffering is not only what they have endured for their entire fandom, but also the name of their Lifetime Network original movie starring Scott Norwood, Thurman Thomas’ Helmet, and Rex/Rob Ryan. They’ll use both like they used the Olsen twins in Full House. For this year, let’s hope we see some eye popping throws out of likeable Jay Cutler. I like this coaching staff, but man, are they not set up super well. The wildcard is this defense, which could be top-half-of-league decent. In any case, I don’t expect more than six or seven wins from the Bills.